Zor Se Bolo - Jai Hypocrisy Ki!

Rows of girls sit along the neatly lined rows of plates, looking forward to being revered and venerated, being put on a pedestal that equals the goddesses. They try to bask in their short lived glory, for they know that this is a far cry from what they are subjected to on a daily basis. 

India is the abode of countless deities, a majority of which are female deities. The concept of Navratra twice a year is a reminder of the fact that India takes pride in the Navdurga. The last 2 days, the nation woke up to celebrate Kanya Pujan, to celebrate being a girl, for this day, every girl is considered to be a manifestation of Durga.

 Ironic, considering the heinous treatment meted out to girls in our country on an everyday basis. Leaves me wondering, does 9 days of goddess worship negate the other 356 days of misogynism we practise?

Our older folks continue to be defensive about questioning anything remotely related to religion, since they have been conditioned to accept things at face value. But our generation likes to test the waters and decide for themselves. So, while this post might stir the hornet's nest, we proudly proclaim there is nothing wrong in thinking differently.

The portrayal of goddesses is also an agent of social construction of female expectations. Idols and images of goddesses mostly show them as the epitome of beauty, fair complexioned, well endowed and adorned with jewellery. This idyllic image of perfection further gives shape to the standards of beauty women are expected to live up to.

The general connotation of 'devi saman aurat' is not one, who like Kali, when provoked, fights for her honour and righteousness, but is characterized by an all forgiving attitude, bearing all the wrong coming her way, meekly accepting her fate. While we are acceptive of a weapon wielding goddess, we are uncomfortable with the notion of a fiercely independent and power yielding woman. There exists a wide gap between what we venerate in mythology and what we seem to practise in the realm of real life.

 The Indian system of marriage is so quintessentially a despicable arrangement, each ritual comprising it is abhorrent in that the girl's family goes through an unspeakable ordeal. So, while you call your bride "ghar ki lakshmi", we know you are making a surreptitious reference to the dowry that she brings in, why on earth are you spending extra efforts and mind on concealing your true diabolic intentions? 

 Meanwhile, our society boasts of being modernised, yet the matrimonial advertisements demand brides who will couple up as a working woman and a homemaker. We still read a plethora of news reports everyday about how girls are harassed, burnt, even murdered for the sake of dowry. In this era of social awareness, we can certainly no longer be insouciant or negligent of what’s eating up our moral and social fibre. We don't want a superficial, pretentious, morally depraved society, do we?

The 15 minutes of respect endowed upon the girls end even before they could sink in. With the submersion of the idol, we seem to drown our reverence towards females as well. Let’s not limit celebrating female power to 9 days, let’s take it upon ourselves to make it last longer.

Delhi... where S#!T happens

6 issues pertaining to Delhi which trouble me

     1)     Travelling Rajni style   

      Though the Delhi Metro has been the saving grace of Delhi’s public transportation, there are areas which still don’t fall under the ambit of metro connectivity. In order to travel to these areas, Delhites have to rely on other means of transport like DTC buses a.k.a ‘thoda adjust karna’ and the autos which will give you a detour of everyplace except the one you want to reach, taking the longest route possible. No DTC bus ride can be devoid of masses of people almost falling out of the bus, and those who are safely lodged inside trying to nudge or even grope you. Try claiming your right to sit on the designated ‘ladies seats ‘and you will be met with sulking faces, reluctantly sacrificing their seats but not without muttering questions about the need for such seats. Sure, if we see the day the XY chromosome could keep their hands to themselves, we will do away with the seats.
The ‘autowallahs’ of Delhi are known for charging obnoxiously exorbitant fares, and don’t even get me started on the tampered meters these autos have. And who can forget the lopsided wicked grins they flash when you approach them during wee hours.

     2)  Blame game

       The roads are filthy? Blame it on the inefficient municipality. The increase in crime rate? Attribute it to the inefficiency of the cops. But hey, between these two, there lies an ‘us’. How about question it sometime too? Our society is a victim of constant blame games. Stop for a moment, and peep into your own conscience. our whole system is marred by name-calling. A volley of expletives is thrown at the slightest provocation. And yeah, this is a subtle hint to my neighbourhood wali aunty not to empty her trash in front of the building and then blame it on the stray dog. So much for blame games, I tell you.

3.      Baap ka naam toh suna hi hoga?

      Nahi suna.  Seems like your PA forgot to sound the bugle and announce the news of your arrival on Earth, Mr. enjoying-life-off-daddy’s-money. While in other countries people carry their ID cards for various purposes, Delhites seem to only carry ‘baap ka naam’ wherever they go- club parties, police stations, colleges, et al. Seems like we’ve invented a nice one-liner there. Even when the rich and powerful break the law, they seem to have immunity against the repercussions that would befall an ordinary citizen. 

4.       Being a woman in Delhi.

      Enough said:  Being a woman in Delhi ain’t easy. We should only travel in the female coaches of the Metro, be home by eight in the evening, never step out on the roads wearing dresses or shorts because apparently they are provocative- you get the drift. They should just start handing out pamphlets with survival tips for females in Delhi. And once they are done with that, they should make one for the ‘Creep-os’ too, who forget where our face is.  Yeh Dilli hai mere yaar.

5.       Ye naarebaazi band karo, kuch nahi hoga isse  

      They say, the onus for bringing about a revolution lies on the youth. I say, atleast let them do that the way they want. When the youth turns out in large numbers to protest, they are greeted with teargas, barricades and lathicharges. For being the largest democracy in the world, we sure are protest intolerant. There goes the largest youth population to a waste.

6.       We will judge you, we will stare at you

     While making life out of living in a tough metropolis that Delhi is, is in itself a daunting task, there are plenty of people to make the road ahead more difficult for you. So, are you wearing shorts? They’ll rechristen you as a slut. You’re seen chatting with a friend from the other sex, we’ll judge you. Even for something as trivial as carrying a sling bag, people will judge you. And as far as staring you unabashedly is concerned, there is a simple rule: have eyes, will stare. While someone staring you may make you uncomfortable, you might even be led to wonder if there is something wrong with you only.

Five things they didn't tell us about FYUP

First of all, those of you, who at the mention of the dreaded acronym "FYUP" have their adrenaline rushing with the excitement to read how it has dampened the spirits of their class-mates, a big salute to you. Just skip to the next paragraph.
And for those of you still wondering what FYUP is, dear person-from-another-planet, it's the blood-sucking, atrocious educational reform that stole the limelight from the soaring cut-offs and bestowed on the guinea pigs batch "perennial uncertainty about the future".
So, while we feel tortured by the gruelling work schedules, envy our seniors who get home before we do, and venture into college life, here's a list of five things they didn't tell us about FYUP.

1) They turned the guinea pigs into rats. Yes I am talking about us!

Remember, how we were tempted with laptops? And we took the bait. What they forgot to mention was that out of the meager 1 year that we would actually have the laptops, one semester would be spent (read:lost) in arranging them. The result is that, now, when we need them the most, we are deprived of them.

You know, watching movies or doing internet research on an everyday basis for the purpose of studying might sound enormously amusing, however, neither is it viable to rush home to use your desktop, nor can you sit glued to it for the rest of your day (that is, whatever might be left of it after the long hours at college). Further, at the risk of sounding very practical, you cannot possibly surreptitiously slip your laptop into your bag against your mother's wishes, use your smartphone 2 hours more than its battery allows, or for that matter, be merciless to your eyes.

2) The Collapsed FOUNDATIONS...

What they never told us was that the joy of holistic development  from the Foundation Courses (or FCs, as they are lovingly/angrily called) would be all too soon surpassed by the hectic schedule, and the mind-boggling quantities and volume of presentations, projects and tests et al would dampen our vivacious spirits.They said the FCs aimed at strengthening our concepts. Reality check: They are belittling them. Because oh, I got so enlightened after attending the GD about prime numbers. College is meant to facilitate specialised study, not send us back to 10th grade.
The scene of a classroom(almost everywhere, barring a few exceptions):The lecturers were as clueless about the impending reforms as we were. They started using the catchphrase "You are a Commerce/Chemistry/Computer science student, you do not need to study History in depth." Enter 55 marks devoted to practical work, and you can find every student researching the most obscure websites on the most ambiguous topics, to dig out some information which is both news to the teacher as well as intellectually stimulating. And someone said something about defeating their very purpose, eh?

3) Ready, set, go. . .

They pretended they had everything organised, all allocation of marks done...but till last week we were getting notices on their website as to the distribution of marks.... 

Alas! and then they so confidently proclaim that there are no infrastructural hurdles. I am amazed the media was right this time in being pessimistic about such hasty decisions-cum-reforms.

Right where it stings

4) IMBH: Integrating mind, body and HELL!

So, you caught me texting in the middle of a lecture elucidating Gandhi and his achievements? Yeah, that is something totally new n interesting, you totally have my attention with you. Grrr

And you were asking me to draw parallels between his life and mine ..but how can I possibly do that..he is the father of the nation and I am a guinea pig, have you forgotten? Wouldn't it be a disgrace to him?

5) College? Did you just misspell "school"?

Also, they forgot to tell us that no longer college means studies AND fun. With back to back classes from 9 to 5, we are working office hours, without the remuneration obviously. Sometimes we feel doing an internship has better prospects for us... rather than a system which shall provide us with a degree after 4 years (notice the sarcasm), "Bachelors in Multiple Disciplines" declaring us as the survivors of DU's large hadron collider experiment. How I love my life. Sigh.

And here I am , in the middle of mid-sem break, surrounded by to-do lists. Whoever said college meant freedom, definitely didn't meet the FYUP batch.

Yeah mate, we are all in this together...